A significant milestone achieved yesterday. It was 10 years (to the day? Yeah, let's say it's that, it makes it seem more significant) since I was banned for life from the crazy golf/putting green,the result of a bet that got a little out of hand... In the words of Roots Manuva "Forgive me Lord, I knew not what I did. I was just a kid trying to hustle up a quid." However, I thought that the person who banned me would probably be dead by now- the last I saw of him he looked as if he was about to have a heart attack. Sure enough, when T and I got there, there was some child who was in charge of admissions, so we got in with no hassle. It would be boastful for me to say I won, so I shall merely let you know that it wasn't a draw and I didn't lose. This was all accompanied by what I suspect was a compilation album called Now That's What I Call Disgustingly Cheesy Pop Hits From The 90's That You Love To Hate: Volume 5. There certainly wasn't any music from the last ten years, and this antediluvian music, if you can call it that, came wafting in on the wind from the adjacent roller skating rink. We then toddled over to the crazy golf, which is apparently a synonym for exercise in futility. There are six holes, and we certainly got our value for money as we were stuck on one of the bastards for about 15 minutes. But the gradients and delapidated nature of the ramps and such meant that it was a bit of an arbitary exercise- you might as well place your ball somewhere and see if continental drift would get it in the hole in a few millenia. No, scratch that. It's more like when you take a running fuck at a rolling doughnut. It's very unpleasant when you miss, and after you finally manage to get it in the hole, you feel embarassed and wonder why you did it in the first place, let alone pay for it. T and I were on the last hole, and he got tempted to see if he could accidentally hit the ball into the adjoining rollerskating rink. "T," I cautioned, "that way lifetime bans from putting greens lie. Plus, you might end up killing that woman who's skating." He gave me a withering look. "She looks like she's fifty and she's skating around to the music of S Club 7. I'd be doing her a favour." He may have had a point.
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