As you may have gathered by now, I do not entirely understand everything, and I think that you might be able to help me with that. I don't suspect that you understand everything either, but there may be an area on which you have some expertise and I have none. This, then, is an effort to address the most pressing areas of my ignorance. So.
I do not understand why Steven Spielberg edited most of the guns out of E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial and replaced them with walkie-talkies to protect the kiddies' fragile little minds, despite leaving all the times the kids say shit in the movie. I also don't understand why they in effect decided to call the film Extra Terrestrial: The Extra Terrestrial. In a similar vein, I don't understand Se7en, or SeSevenen as it should be called.
I do not understand why being racist towards Jews has its own special term in the form of anti-semitic when directing hatred towards any other racial group is just racism. Doesn't that suggest that the Jews are better than other races so racism directed towards them gets a special name? Well that's just racist.
I do not understand where drinking yoghurt disappeared to- that was massively popular in the early 90's.
I do not understand the casting director for Game of Thrones. Some of the members of the cast are superb, and some are utterly devoid of talent. Perhaps the casting director is bi-polar, or perhaps they ran out of money and could only afford dross.
I do not understand cricket's Duckworth-Lewis method. Then again, NO-ONE understands the Duckworth-Lewis method.
I do not understand why 50 Shades of Grey is so popular. These sort of books have been about for a while, the Marquis de Sade's 120 Days of Sodom being a case in point . 50 Shades hasn't got particularly good reviews actually. If you look on Amazon, you'll see that the majority of readers rated it 5 out of 5 or 1 out of 5. To date, 1,883 gave it the best possible score and 1,368 gave it the worst. I was quite surprised and distressed when doing the prep for this piece of writing that so many thought this an excellent book. I had to look at these reviews... And then I regained my faith in humanity. A great many of the reviews scoring 50 Shades of Grey are somewhat tongue in cheek to say the least.
"It's the perfect size to fit into my toaster! You wouldn't believe the different shades of grey smoke that come out after 10 minutes! "
"my five stars are awarded to all the talented reviewers who have amused me. i don't need to read the book. they've given me the gist! well done all who've suffered on my behalf."
Or there are apparently sincere views by idiots like this:
"great read didnt want to put the book down .Hope a film is made that will be interesting lol All my friends have got it and love it as much as me .great job !!!"
But here is my favourite review that I've come across, and it is most certainly not tongue in cheek...
The highlight of the review is arguably the recurring words count, of whom a few below:
"Oh My" - 79
"Crap" - 101
"Holy (shit/fuck/crap/hell/cow/moses)" - 172
"Murmur" - 68
"Murmurs" - 139
"Whisper" - 96
"Whispers" - 103
"Inner goddess" - 58
"Subconscious" - 82
I do not understand how she had the strength of will to compile that.
Today's Tune
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