In Which I Tenuously Link the Pet Shop Boys with the Daily Mail

I watched a bit of the Paralympic/Olympic parade yesterday, and stopped quite quickly because I didn't enjoy the taste of my sick. This wasn't due to the medal winners soaking in the adulation, they're welcome to all that. But after a closing ceremony where Coldplay played a not at all out of proportion 15 song set, we were treated to a victory parade with the bloody Pet Shop Boys. I could handle them at the Olympics Closing ceremony, but this was just taking the piss. "Okay, all the athletes pile up here behind the Pet Shop Boys and try not to look bored shitless..." "Hello, we're the Pet Shop Boys again.  We're going to play you the same song we did the other day, it's a song that's sort of to do with the Olympics because it's called West End girls and some girls watched the Olympics and we're at Buckingham Palace so we're sort of in the West End of London. 1, 2, 3, 4..."

*Athletes look bored, unhappy*

 

Medallists realise that the Pet Shop Boys are going to play ANOTHER song

"Okay, now we're going to sing a song that we didn't write. It's called "Go West", and we're going to justify shoehorning it in here by saying that the Olympics are going west to Brazil. Never mind that if you went west from here you'd end up in Canada, and that if you want to get to Rio by going west from the nearest landmass that you'd have to set off from the capital of Namibia. Most of all, it doesn't matter that this is a cover that's terrible compared to the original and even if wasn't compared to the original it'd STILL be a crock of shit. 1, 2, 3, 4..."

 *Athletes contemplate suicide*

One other thing. I was looking up who'd be on which float for the parade as one of my friends was a Gamesmaker (that is, a volunteer) and wanted to know which athletes were on which float so I looked it up on the internet and came across a Daily Mail article. The article itself was surprisingly free of righteous indignation and "the country has gone to the dogs" dogma. However, I did a very stupid thing, the cardinal sin that one can commit whilst on the Daily Mail website. I STARTED LOOKING AT THE READERS' COMMENTS BELOW THE ARTICLE. I started haemorrhaging blood out of my eyes when I read the fifth comment, by someone whose moniker was "Despairing about the way its going". That's a warning sign already. Those of a logical disposition should look away now:

"Fabulous that it takes place in London, where only a tiny proportion of the British people actually live. I'll think of the parade while I'm at work. In West Yorkshire."

Skipton, where the majority of the British people actually live

What is this prick suggesting? First of all, it makes sense to have the parade in the host city, and 8+ million people is quite a large number, AND the transport links are pretty good.  Second of all, can he suggest a place where the majority of the British population live? He seems to sarcastically say that it's impossible for him to travel to London from third world Yorkshire, and that Yorkshire might well be a better venue and not at all because he lives there. Actually, it's probably true- after all, Skipton is famous for being the best transport hub in the country and for being a megalopolis. Third of all, there are other victory parades that he'd know about if he'd just check before bitching about things. Finally, is he suggesting that the parade goes around the country for seventy days like the torch did? I know they're athletes, but they're going to get tired, physically and mentally- there's only so many times you can listen to the Pet Shop Boys tenuously linking themselves with the Olympics.

Today's Tune